PDA

View Full Version : ->->- The One Liner Thread -<-<


Stealthy
24-08-2003, 10:02 PM
Here are a few ive got from my e-mail box

Whats the difference between erotic and kinky?
erotic you use a feather, kinky you use the whole chicken

What's the difference between a light and a hard?
A man can sleep with a light on.

Q: What is Iraq's national bird?
A: Duck.

Q: Definition of a 68er?
A: You blow me and I will owe you 1

Two elephants walk off a cliff...boom, boom!

Take my advice; I don't use it anyway.
If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you!
Anything not nailed down is a cat toy.
I saw Elvis. He sat between me and Bigfoot on the UFO.
Next time you wave, use all your fingers.
He does the work of three men: Larry, Moe and Curly.
A procrastinator's work is never done.
I like kids, but I don't think I could eat a whole one.
If puns were outlawed, only outlaws would have puns.
I was the next door kid's imaginary friend.
If you believe in telekinesis, raise my hand.
Despite the high cost of living, it remains popular.
i'm an apathetic sociopath - I'd kill you if I cared.
Do radioactive cats have 18 half-lives?
Even crime wouldn't pay if the government ran it.


When I die, I want to die in my sleep, like my grandmother. Not screaming in terror like the passengers in her car

Confusious Say: Man with hole in pocket feel cocky all day.

Why dont you . a hooker in the morning?
Ever try opening a cold grilled cheese sandwhich?

Q: What is the definition of "making love"?
A: Something a woman does while a guy is .ing her.

Q: What's yellow and green and eats nuts?
A: Gonorrhoea

Q: Why did God create yeast infections?
A: So women would know what it's like to live with an
irritating beautiful woman once in a while too

Q. How can you tell a macho woman?
A. She rolls her own tampons.

Q. Why do fags like ribbed condoms?
A. Better traction in the mud.

WirlWind
24-08-2003, 10:28 PM
lol i liked the ribbed condom joke.funny.

Q: Whats the only shop open in Iraq?
A: Target

PROVERBS

-Reality is for people who can't cope with drugs
-If at first you don't succeed, run away.
-When at first you don't succeed, read the fu**ing instructions!!!
-One legged girls are a pushover
-If the epileptic fits, wear it!
-There are three types of women. The beautiful, the intelligent and the majority.
-There are three types of people. People who can count and people who can't.
-Today is tomorrows yesterday

LESBIANS

-Is a lesbian a pansy without a stalk?
Q:What do you call a lesbian with fat fingers?
A:Well hung

GAYS

-Old fairies never die. They simply blow away.
-We know a gay guy who is so ugly, he has to go out with girls!
Bill- How did you feel when you found out you were gay?
Basil- It was quite a blow!

There's a new medical crisis. Doctors are reporting that many men ae having allergic reactions to latex condoms. They say they cause severe swelling.

OK OK So they suck but meh... 8)

MCUD
25-08-2003, 05:29 PM
Now can we please stop posting in blue.. it's a REAL bitch to read

myrddin
27-08-2003, 07:15 PM
make ur dreams come true, wake up!

success comes to 2 kinds 'o ppl.
those who r always on their toes, and those always treading on other ppls...